Agree to disagree, Words With Friends.

I was playing Words With Friends on my iPhone and it got me thinking about how pissed off Scrabble must be about this happy horse shit. Or actually how pissed off Hasbro Games, parent company of Scrabble must be. Because Scrabble is an inanimate object and can’t experience feelings. But a corporation bleeds and feels sad and/or horny just like you or I do. Not necessarily all at the same time but also not necessarily not.

Did you know Scrabble has an app? Do you give a fuck? Oh, you do? Well pretend you don’t for a second and play along. It’ll make this whole thing easier. Thanks pal…. That’s right, you don’t give a fuck, and it’s all because of the new sexy kid on the block. (By kid, obviously I mean at least 18 years of age or the age of consent in the country/state/territory that you’re reading this in. I’m talking about you, Thailand/Alabama/Narnia.)

But if Words With Friends is gonna be the new sexy barely legal bitch on the block, they are going to have to start acting like it and slut it up a bit. They need to start accepting the fact that us kids talk the way we do, and we aren’t gonna change that for all the blue ice in Walter White‘s Winnebago. Calm down Breaking Bad fans, I know it’s Jesse Pinkman‘s Winnebago, but I do love me some alliteration and I shan’t apologize for it. I’m just saying you gotta accept the fact that us youngsters like to drop some crazy lyrical flavor up in your motherfuckin’ grill  24/7/365, bitch swear words occasionally, officer. I know that you accept some swear words like bitch and shit but let’s take this where it needs to go. To the top. Or to the bottom. Yes, let us travel there. To the deep, dark bottom. It’s always more fun in the mud.So do the right thing, good web design type people and make Swear Words With Friends.

I’d buy it, and I bet a lot of other people would buy it too. HELL, I KNOW THEY WOULD. Sorry for yelling but I’m passionate about this issue. I already go out of my way and sacrifice valuable points and strategic tile placements to spell twat. Imagine if I could spell jizzmop on a triple word score? I’d be unstoppable.

And if Words With Friends won’t do it someone else should steal their my idea and make a mint off it. Someone like Scrabble. Steal it back m@&*erfuckers, and make a mint….. You’re welcome Hasbro Games.

Just give me free downloads for life and a fuckin’ back rub…. ya heard?

8 responses »

  1. Gillian Colbert says:

    I’d play … LOL … Loved this!

  2. clownonfire says:

    Lord Evil Poppy is screaming all sorts of words that could be used in this version of the game… We would so kick anyone’s ass…
    The Clown

  3. free penny press says:

    Awesome.. got me thinking of all kinds of words now..
    best laugh of the day..

  4. John Granahan says:

    Just thought of a better one. “ex-jizzmop”.

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