Oh,someones getting some tail tonight for sure

 

It’s a big old bitch bastard of a world we live in, filled with mysteries that have baffled man since the dawn of time.Why are we here? What is the purpose of life? Does Bigfoot exist? Why the hell did they cancel Dance 360 ? Some of the most important questions have been debated through the ages by both scholars and dummies alike. I like to think of myself as somewhere in the middle, like Rain Man. Now hold on, I’m not saying I AM Rain Man. I’m just saying that with all of the numerous obvious similarities betwixt us, any rational person would most likely come to the inevitable conclusion that Bill McMorrow is Rain Man. But I’m not…Take that Google, now whenever anyone searches the internet for Academy Award Best Picture Winner “Rain Man”, they’ll see billmcmorrow.com. It’s called “playing the game”, I takes it where I gets it. Anyway this here smart/dumb guy is going to attempt to answer some of life’s most enduring questions with the help of nothing but my incredible cognitive capacity to digest, evaluate, store and subsequently regurgitate every scrap of knowledge that has ever been embedded in my skull by the Encyclopedia Britannica of Life. Plus I might use Google.

  • Q:Which came first, the chicken or the egg?
    A:Just using my extensive knowledge of basic biology, coupled with my almost disturbing interest in  animal husbandry, and cross referenced with literature about pleasing the ladies that I received from that free clinic that I don’t want to talk about , I would say that the rooster probably came first. See, the roosters the male, and when a man loves a woman, or chicken for this particular scenario, he takes her out for Chinese food and scorpion bowls, and maybe a little karaoke. The ladies go crazy for the karaoke. They have some laughs, let off some steam, maybe head back to the coop, play a little “How ’bout a back rub”, and cock-a-doodle-doo, the rooster comes first. Then maybe the chicken came too, if the roosters not too much of a dick and doesn’t just fall asleep, which we all know he’s gonna do anyway. Why does she stay with that jerk? What does she see in him? Well yes, his plumage is stunning and granted he does seem to muster up quite a bit of respect from the other livestock in the yard, I’ll give you that. But does he listen to her? Does…He….Listen…To….Her?. No, he doesn’t…Then like 9 months later the egg comes. Ta-Dah! Chicken baby. The cycle of life commences yet again.

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